January 4th, 2008

When Ass Burger Boy was about nine years old, he announced that he was never going to leave home. I replied that he could live home as long as he pursued his education or had a job.

Note: World of Warcraft is not a job. Monday, we find out if he will be attending community college yet again this semester.

When he graduated high school, he said to me: “Mom, I bet you’d thought you would never see this day.” to which I replied, because I’m quick that way : “Oh, I knew I would see the day. I just wasn’t sure how old you would be when I saw it.”

He was pleased to be, as he so charmingly put it: “Getting out of Hell.” The social situations of school were very stressful to him, with the ever-present mouth-breathers who liked to call him “retard” or whatever lovely sobriquet their tiny little brains came up with. When they had a thought.

I was very nervous when he graduated because I was the only member of his family present. There was a lot of noise made by family members of graduating students, and I had a very sore throat.

Right before his name was called, there was a stellar graduate, who won a coveted scholarship, was active in sports, and an all-round popular, good guy. I cringed a little when the all the noise happened.

When it was Ass Burger Boy’s turn, it absolutely astonished me that the most noise made in the auditorium that day was for HIM! It truly was a teary-eyed experience.

I hope he learned something that day. School was so stressful for him because he obsessed over the mouth-breathers. He wasn’t even remotely aware how many people were pulling for him to succeed.

He’s already griping about the new people he doesn’t know yet, and about the chemistry instructor that he doesn’t like.

I’m resigned to the fact that his schooling will take a lot longer than that of a usual offspring. This is not an entirely small matter, as it impacts my social life somewhat.

Phone: Ring, ring.

ABB: “Hullo.”

Male voice: “I’m calling to see if witchypoo is ready for our date.”

ABB: (in little kid voice) “Are you my new Daddy?”

Phone: Click.

This entry was posted on Friday, January 4th, 2008 at 10:27 am and is filed under Ass Burger Boy, the mundane. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

20 Responses to “World of Warcraft is not a job”

josey Says:

i’m laughing. REALLY hard. almost choking on my apple. LOL!

i’m sorry if its not really funny! HEHE!! ;)

on a more serious note, i hope ABB learned something too. im sure its not very easy to forget about the buttheads when you know you are “different,” and you can’t really change. but i bet if he just mustered up a bit more confidence, he’d notice the nice ppl a bit more often :) best of luck to him next semester!!

josey’s last blog post..witchypoo goes to kalamazoo**

witchypoo Says:

Josey: I laughed too. How could you NOT? But I haven’t given out my phone number to mens since. Email’s the ticket hereabouts.

daysgoby Says:

Oh-ho, just wait until HE starts bringing a girl home….

daysgoby’s last blog post..this couch doesn’t speak to me

witchypoo Says:

As long as he doesn’t bring her home to live, I’m good with it.

Calamity Says:

ROFLMAO! Oh dear! How funny!

Calamity’s last blog post..TGIF!

daysgoby Says:

Hey, good point! There are Queens County and Lunenburg Freecycles, actually – although these tend to be more in the arena of used computer equipment and baby stuff.

And I’m sure you’re right. But it’s odd. He hates to throw anything away (as my house bears witness!) yet hates getting anything used….men! Such critters!

daysgoby’s last blog post..this couch doesn’t speak to me

Ree Says:


How wonderful though – ABB with the most applause.

Ree’s last blog post..Tell Me Where to Go?

RaeJane Says:

oh. my!

A very dear friend of mine has 3 sons on the spectrum and they are all three in love with WOW.. she said you can tell WOW addicts by their pale complection cause they never see the sun.


RaeJane’s last blog post..3 good choices for President

Marie Says:

WoW’s not a job? Can you tell my husband that? Please?

Marie’s last blog post..Coulda Woulda Shoulda

Jenny Says:

I’m saying a quiet little prayer of gratitude that I don’t know what WOW is. I’m assuming it’s in the realm of computer and/or video games. All in due time, I’m sure. Not that DH wouldn’t LOVE to play it, but my threats of death have actually been heeded. So far.

Jenny’s last blog post..Pick Me Pick Me Pick Me

AntiBarbie Says:

Man, I wish WOW were a job, then maybe my deadbeat little brother would actually be able to contrinute something to society other than helping other players “raid”.

AntiBarbie’s last blog post..Don’t pin your lifestyle on Jesus!

JeanC Says:

I so can’t understand what everyone sees in WOW. I have to say I like the games I play (Diablo II and several first person shoot’em ups and hack and slashers), but I don’t obsess about them the way i see others with WOW. Some people seem to think it is real life! Now that is scary.

Love the conversation with ABB answering the phone, that is just too funny hehehehehehe.

JeanC’s last blog post..WHHEEE HAAA!!!!!!

teeni Says:

Ah – HAHAHA! This was a great post! LOVED it! I’m a Stumbling it!

teeni’s last blog post..Some Bad News and Some Good News

old Knudsen Says:

Maybe ABB is sick of the constant calls you get for dates and is just having his wee joke. I can’t stand video games for more than 10 minutes at a time then I’m bored, back in my day it was a rock and an policemen that was our version of a video game.

old Knudsen’s last blog post..Monkey Business Turns Nasty

nan Says:

I, too, have no idea what W.O.W. Is all about.

But in some societies, girls are EXPECTED to move in with their in-laws. That way she can learn to cook the way you do, and you can keep an eye on her and make sure she is looking after your precious boy-child. My mother-in-law is Muslim, and she was very sad that I stole her son away! But I like her too much, and wanted it to stay that way. I could never live in that house. But that is because I am a badass white girl. So many people are happy with such an arrangement.

nan’s last blog post..JOY! school starts Monday!

witchypoo Says:

I’m going to ask ABB to explain WoW. Some people have problems distinguishing it from real life, and I remind him often of that, but he still is pretty excited about it. He’s one of those uber-players at level 48.
@Nan: I’m glad I don’t live in those societies. No new people.
@Knudsen: I wonder if your brain ever shuts down. Man, you’re sharp as a tack.
@teeni: Stumbling is better than chocolate to me. I truly appreciate it. That’s why all those annoying little icons end each post. That and the vote thingie. Are you all getting sick of it yet?
@everyone else: I love love love your comments, but my brain, it has shut down. Please don’t stop commenting, I truly enjoy the discussions here.

ABB Says:

for all of you that asked, wow is an online game with a monthly fee. basically you can quest, fight stuff and interact with people. And last time i checked, my skin isn’t pale.
for more info, go to http://www.worldofwarcraft.com
that should explain it.
Oh and yeah, some guys forget that real life exists because of that game and it is said to ruin lives etc.
In my case, I didn’t have one before computers and warcraft, and the only thing that’s changed is I’m not sitting alone bored.

ABB Says:

Well, I sit alone, but not bored.(so that last statement was true)

Summa Dis, Summa Dat | Psychicgeek Says:

[...] And, just to underline my nuttiness, this room appears like it couldn’t make up its mind what it wanted to be. It’s a multi-purpose room for sure. It serves as a room for tape recorded readings, a dining room, and there’s even a spare bunk if I have platonic overnight company. Or non-platonic company who snores. Not that that would be happening [...]

zoe Says:

LMAO…dear god i just sprayed coke all over my computer! he is tooooo freaking funny!!!

zoe’s last blog post..On a wing and a prayer