March 27th, 2008

“I found this, Mom”

“What did you find, Ass Burger Boy?”

“This.”

“I can’t see it, it’s dark. NAME the object you are

holding in your hand.”

(frustrated) “THIS!” I can imagine him pointing to

the object in the dark.

This scenario also repeats itself when I’m driving, or doing something else

that needs full visual attention.

And my eyesight ain’t as sharp as it used to be.

When I can’t discern the object, he will edge closer

and closer to show me, rather than name the thing.

It drives me cah-ray-zee.

Not a long drive these days, I might add.

This is just one quirk I figure is attributable to Asperger’s Syndrome.

Did any of you watch Dawson’s Creek?

The boy is a dead ringer for Dawson.

Out of his mouth come the most bizarre and inappropriate things. He likes to shock people.

The other day, he asked me (a la boxers or briefs)

“Zucchini or cucumber?”

See, your mom isn’t someone you’re supposed to feel

comfortable asking that to.

He doesn’t hear my explanation of this concept (for what?…the zillionth time?)

He is doubled over with laughter.

Smartarse. Thinks he’s Tom Green.

This entry was posted on Thursday, March 27th, 2008 at 1:26 pm and is filed under Ass Burger Boy, old photos. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

14 Responses to “The Drive to Crazy? Not a Long One”

Old Knudsen Says:

Zucchini or cucumber? I believe them both to be some kind of food, maybe he is making you a special mother’s day meal. Get yer mind out of the gutter . The correct question is, anteater or helmet head?

Old Knudsen’s last blog post..Touched By A Bigfoot

Angella Says:

He sounds like someone who would be a whole lot of fun to have around.

Except for the first part – My kids do it all of the time and it drives me CRAZY.

Angella’s last blog post..You Do What You Love

Mylifeasmomma Says:

Oh my lord! Well what is it?

Mylifeasmomma’s last blog post..Yeah I spoke too soon

warriorwoman Says:

uh huh, and what was your answer?

warriorwoman’s last blog post..?hey bartender, I’ll have another?

witchypoo Says:

All: I still do not get a thrill from the produce section. You guys? More inappropriate than him. Although I noted that both vegetables can be peeled.

Tamera Says:

Ah, I think it’s kinda cute.

Tamera’s last blog post..Pentad’s Guest Author- From a man’s heart.

Ree Says:

My short drive to crazy involves, “Mom. Can you come here?” Which is up the stairs and down the hall just as I get comfortable.

Why can’t he walk down the stairs? I’m 28 years older than him.

Ree’s last blog post..Calm and Serene

Jenny Says:

You should answer him with as off-the-wall an answer as you can muster.
“Mom, look at this.”
“Oh, ABB, that cheese grater you’ve got is awesome! Did you buy that yourself?”

“Zucchini or cucumber?”
“Yes, I love the smell of rain on a summer evening. Thanks for asking.”

Jenny’s last blog post..Smacked with Weird Nostalgia

mommyknows Says:

Hahaha … love Tom Green (mostly). I hope he doesn’t decide to paint up your car.

mommyknows’s last blog post..Haiku (Refresh My Memory).

teeni Says:

I loved Dawson’s Creek.

Zucchini or Cucumber? I don’t get it. They both look the same after I’ve put them through my spiral slicer.

teeni’s last blog post..The Archive Meme

Loralee Says:

I’m afraid I do the whole “Hand me THAT” thing, too.

Sigh.

Loralee’s last blog post..Sideblog: Have you ever ?Tagged? me on your blog?

Veronica Says:

Zuchini or cucumber? That boy has a huge…..um….ego.

Veronica’s last blog post..Dear Libido,

ALF Says:

That is too funny! Boys…

ALF’s last blog post..Joey Doesn’t Share Food!

mommyknows Says:

You’re right … crazy ain’t far. I’ve been there and back several times in just one day.

mommyknows’s last blog post..Excuses, Excuses