February 20th, 2009

Long ago, I used to sell cars. This was thrilling to me because I was the first female car sales rep in my region. I’m a groundbreaker alright.

Friday nights were a hoot. All hands were on deck, but nobody wanted to greet any customers. Why? You might very well ask.

The sales manager, Saucy Man, would gather us in his office for the weekly “sales meeting”. There was always full attendance.

The sales meeting would begin with Saucy Man producing a 40 oz bottle of Bacardi, removing the cap, and throwing said cap in the wastebasket with the same announcement “We won’t be needing this anymore.”

It was there that I learned to play bullshit poker, but with money, rather than cards. I forget now how it’s played, except if you were called on your serial number, and didn’t have what you said you had, you lost the money. We also made crazy bets, like one guy suckered me into a bet that he could drive a stick shift without ever stalling and without ever using the clutch. I figured he had forgotten about stopping, so took him up on it. He switched off the ignition upon stopping, thus preventing a stall.

It was there that I first learned the word “dirtbag”, a word I promptly used on the winner of aforementioned bet.

We ate lunch at the tavern, every day.

I saw some sleazy things go on in the dealership, and it wasn’t until much later that I figured it out. By “it” I mean, how did they live with themselves?

I myself, was insulted if someone distrusted me and assumed I was lying. It drove me crazy.

Most of them did lie and misrepresent the used cars. I was also indignant when they stole my deals out from under me.

Guess liquor is great for pushing that pesky conscience aside.

Fuck you very much.

This entry was posted on Friday, February 20th, 2009 at 9:54 am and is filed under stories from the olden days. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

11 Responses to “Saucy Man”

Torch Says:

I just can’t believe it – you were so saucy and in your face at that time – how could anyone have stole your deals – tell me, did you let them live afterwards????? If you did, I certainly hope they were at least bruised!!! lol

Old Knudsen Says:

I myself, was insulted if someone distrusted me and assumed I was lying. It drove me crazy.

yep thats me.

Old Knudsens last blog post..LOLslam

Krissa Says:

I imagine the “Fuck you very much” phrase was used a good deal during those formative days… or should have been. ;-

Krissas last blog post..Good news, good news, good news!

teeni Says:

I can see why you’d be insulted if someone didn’t trust you but you now know why that would be – it was nothing personal but probably more just caution from past experience. I quickly left an auto dealership when two gentlemen (sales reps) started talking to each other in a different language after greeting me in English. I knew then that I couldn’t trust them and even if they were innocent, then they should have been able to speak English in front of me. I hightailed it. And yeah – I think the bottle does do that magic on the conscience for a lot of people. Sad.

teenis last blog post..Catching Up

Ree Says:

I swear I learn something new about you every day! Really. A car saleswoman?

Rees last blog post..Or I need to call The Ghostbusters.

Andy Bailey Says:

did you manage to sell many cars? I hate doing sales jobs, it’s a damn shame because I am usually good at them :(

Andy Baileys last blog post..Please, don’t do this on twitter.

lceel Says:

So … just what was the bet FOR? What did you lose? Anything more than money?

Inquiring minds want to know.

lceels last blog post..A Day Off

Theresa Says:

So much for ”in vino veritas” or whatever it is.

Theresas last blog post..Live and Learn # 37654

Coast Rat Says:

I used to work at a place like that, too, but not for very long. My sales manager used to say, “Hey, take it and run, any way you can.” I ran, alright, right away from those bastards, as quickly as I could.

I’ve seen that money bill game played, too, but never played it myself.

Coast Rats last blog post..Another Mississippi Mardi Gras Parade

Hyphen Mama Says:

Did you know beforehand if you’d sell a car? Would you know psychically if somebody was willing to pay your price, but just playing the game?

Hyphen Mamas last blog post..Bullet Point Saturday (Sorry folks, it’s all I’ve got in me today)

Talina Says:

Reminds me of the days working in telemarketing… Liquor would have helped but I was only 15.

Talinas last blog post..Home birthing supply kit and Tater preparations.