October 22nd, 2008

My long time buddy, Torch, jumped to my rescue when I mentioned that I couldn’t pull a story out of my arse. She and the Big V were my partners in crime long ago, and we had us some times. I think Torch remembers more of them because she was more sober than the rest of us. Torch usually drove.

Torch’s decrepit Ford Cortina was particularly memorable . The rust was so bad, it was all that held it together. When we reached a certain speed, the fenders would lift. We thought we were flying in that Cortina. The splendour was not confined to the rust-riddled body, oh, no, it was not. Inside were many fast food meal remnants, and all manner of refuse. On the floor in the back grew a single marijuana plant. Makes sense, with all the smoking and the readily available compost. Torch always hollered at us so we wouldn’t trample her little pet plant. We honoured Torch’s wishes. She had a fearsome temper.

This is the vehicle that brought us on countless road trips. Often, we would tear about an hour up the highway to a nice park, and pack a lunch. How they ever put up with my insufferable bossiness is beyond me, but Torch assures me that I insisted we only bring biodegradable items with us. (Maybe I had seen her car?) So, boiled eggs it was.

We got all glammed up, because really, a girl can’t look too pretty when she’s hiking the trails of a park with a waterfall in it. I think I was in a big hat-wearing phase at the time, so over the top was my every day look. There was much hilarity and picture taking. And more hilarity. Sponsored by our friend, Mary Jane. What a bunch of nature nuts.

We were very subtle with our Southern Comfort on the way there, and in the park. We had dixie cups. Southern Comfort was good because we didn’t have to bother ourselves with that pesky mixer. We drank it straight. Bad arse nature nuts. What? It went well with the boiled eggs. Which, as you may recall, were biodegradable.

Big V and Torch with their Southern Comfort.

The don’t drink and drive thing? Because you might hit a bump and spill it? The Big V was driving back, and had her dixie cup in her hand when she turned the wheel. She dumped the contents in her lap. And was very whiney because she wasted good Southern Comfort.

Yes, we were eejits. It was a million years ago. Before all the edjamacational tv ads that spell out why drinking and driving is a bad thing. Bad arse stoopid nature nuts.

Good thing the windows worked in that Ford Cortina. What with Southern Comfort and boiled eggs, I think ventilation was in order. Even for nature nuts.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, October 22nd, 2008 at 6:32 pm and is filed under The Big V, Torch, stories from the olden days. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

12 Responses to “Road Trip”

Ree Says:

I want to transport back in time and go on a road trip with you.

Rees last blog post..The Semi-Wrap-Up

Kelley Says:

Boiled eggs and Southern Comfort? Weird arsed nature nuts methinks.

Oranges would have been better. Fibre, a mixer and a cup.

Kelleys last blog post..The sentence I never in my wildest dreams thought I would hear…

Marie in Maine Says:

I have many stories involving road trips and
my older brothers, but for girls day out, the Boones Farm/Kangamangus Highway trip was pretty memorable. One of them was a preacher’s daughter, too, so you can imagine she was a big party chick.

Love your description of the car. Most excellent.

Marie in Maines last blog post..Harvest on the Harbor: Culinary Marketplace – Oct. 25

Theresa Says:

*giggle* Sounds like me and my girls. Except maybe the MJ plant would never have survived *cough cough*

Great story :-D

Theresas last blog post..Thursday Thirteen… on turning 30

Andy Bailey Says:

@Ree: oh yeah!, can I come too? and could we drive one of those long cars with the wooden bits down the side?

Andy Baileys last blog post..New platforms supported for CommentLuv

calamity Says:

Hey there! Sounds like a lot of fun, you guys use to have! Im back, but in a new home. Be sure and come by!!

Jenny Says:

BAD BAD BAD memories of SoCo. Well, they’d be bad memories if I remembered, but those nights were a blur.

Jennys last blog post..Because I’m A Sharer

Karen Says:

I think we can all relate, at least I know I did some really stoopid things when I was way younger than I am now.

Karens last blog post..Project 365 day 18

Talina Says:

You know when you mentioned the hard boiled egg thing my mind went right to sharting! This is why I avoid hard boiled eggs.

Talinas last blog post..Updates and water drops…

warriorwoman Says:

Boiled eggs???

Farting with boiled eggs behind it – makes you a big stinker.

I think you’re full of shit – and a big stinker.

Southern Comfort? Liquor store didn’t sell gin?

warriorwomans last blog post..shake a leg

Krissa Says:

I bet if anyone had lit a match in that car to smoke…whatever, you would have all burst into flames. What with all the Southern Comfort and gaseous boiled egg fume farts. ;)
Good times, sounds like.

Krissas last blog post..White trash extraordinaire.

recycling bin Says:

My daughter is graduatind from high school this spring so some friends and I are planning a couple of road trips to celebrate my new found freedom.