Once again, it is time for Ask Witchypoo, as if I knew anything. Jenny would like to think I do, so she asks:

There’s much debate about the big 2012 “event” that’s going to change the world forever. Do you have any visions? Thoughts about what may or may not happen? Or do you just think it’s another Y2K everybodys-panties-in-a-wad prediction?

Dec. 21, 2012, at 11:11pm, is when the Maya’s “Long Count” calendar marks the end of a 5,126-year era. The research available is enough to make a person dizzy, but what I get from it is that the calendar resets at that time of amazing planetary alignment. We had another powerful planetary alignment in May of 2000. This did not end the world as we know it with a bang, but rather, heralded many changes in the earth’s weather patterns, to name only one. Remember that the earth wobbled on its axis at the time of the tsunami Dec 26, 2004. The earth shifting its axis is part of the predictions for great planetary upheaval. I see this resetting of the Mayan calendar as a similar heralding of changes to come. And they aren’t good.

When I look ahead, I look further than 2012, and all I see is grey. Grey because it is a land devoid of vegetation. I see even more suffering and hardship, and I don’t much like it. People’s ugliness coming out to bring about survival of the ruthless. I just don’t want to live in a world without ruth.

Knudsey has some questions as well, but that is going to be part two. For now, I will wish you happy St. Patrick’s Day, and eyeball that pitiful shamrock on my header. It’s going DOWN soon. Bonus! St. Patrick’s Day Puzzle!

Create your own puzzles at PuzzleBee.com!

From the talented and fragrant Jenny comes a jim-dandy question that deserves a post of its own:

How,exactly, would the run-of-the-mill person go about starting to heal themself?

First thing you want to do is achieve an altered state of consciousness.If you don’t know how to do that with your breath techniques, this will tell you.

Now what I did (sending love to afflicted areas) was easy for me because I have done it so many times. There is kind of a neural pathway already established by years of practice in my case, but you can get some decent results with your own practising. One of the women who is sending me energy on my uppitywomen list says she is getting really good at it, and added that she had a good teacher (me). However, I spent a fair amount of time in online healing sessions and a lot of one to one for this to happen.

It won’t happen without practice, no matter how much natural ability you may have. But, the following meditation technique will take away headaches, and whatever else hurts you. It isn’t quite what I used yesterday, but it’s a great start.

If you cannot imagine your healing guides (you have them, really) then think of your favourite star, and draw energy down from it.

Here is the tricky part, so pay careful attention. You need to visualize a wheel within a wheel, each spinning in different directions.

The outer wheel is red, it spins counter-clockwise. The inner wheel is blue, and it spins clockwise. The wheels are on a horizontal plane about 2 feet above your head, and large enough to fit the girth of your body comfortably.

When the wheels are energized from your star or your guides, slowly lower them towards your head.

Feel the action of the wheels coaxing any disruptive energy from your head, and as it lowers, it teases, and coaxes the tangled knots of energy away into the void between the two wheels.

Bring it down level with the top of your head, always alllowing the energy to be teased and coaxed into the void, slowly, lowering it bit by bit until all it has passed has been brought into the void.

As the energy clears, slowly lower the wheels, still teasing at the disruptive energy, the pain, the knots, the darkness. As you feel a clearing in one area, slowly move lower.

Continue this until you reach your feet, and when they feel clear, allow the wheels to connect with the earth to ground you.

Then, zzt! Up they go, smoothing and leaving behind wholeness. As the wheels clear your head, allow the energy to return to the star, or your guides, and give thanks.

This is a basic technique that will take some practice to perfect. I use it in conjunction with others each time I run energy. It is, by itself, surprisingly effective, even for migraines.

If you would like to learn a few basic exercises to heal others, let me know, and I will compose a post about that at a later date.

The number one search term to date is “meat juice” . I’m not sure I want to know just what was in people’s minds when they searched for it, but I published a post that may have coined the term, and it did create a bit of buzz.

blogging mediocrity - Let’s not be cruel, people.

place your face on a movie star - Somehow, I don’t think the movie star would appreciate it.

Is meat juice blood? - Why, yes, yes it is.

“torture Bra” - This might be number two in the list of search terms. I think whoever did the searching might have been looking for a specific creepy device, but really, all bras are by nature, instruments of torture.

pictures that make your eyes bleed - Use your own imagination here.

fart breathing device - I’m not sure if this is intended to find a way to breathe when farts are around, or a device that lets you breathe actual farts. Wouldn’t that be a big seller?

what can i eat to make me fart? - I don’t know why you would want to know this, unless you are planning to produce fodder for the fart breathing device, but may I suggest beans?

are men only supposed to fart - I think this was prompted by Old Knudsen’s comment. They wanted to verify his information.

girls dont fart - I think we have settled that one.

see girls farting - Someone believes not only that girls do fart, but that there may be photographic evidence. The only visible farts are the ones you light. Are we sensing a trend here?

toilets “air assist” - Maybe if you need help farting? I’m good thanks. Nothing to see here folks, just move along.

badarse - This could happen after fart lighting gone terribly, terrribly wrong.

can you throw-up your poop? - If you eat it, I would think it would be mandatory.

wicked image - Of course, that is the kind of image you would expect from a Tool of Satan. In these parts, however, wicked can mean “very” as in, “This lobster is wicked good”. Lobster is another food that makes you fart.

how to make a girl horny with touch - I’m not sure how this got to me. I can only imagine the sad little man who so desperately wants to get laid.

how to get a boy horny give me advice - You’ll have to submit this question to “Ask witchypoo”.

whales as healers - Yes, but their office might be a bit quirky. And I would love to see their lab coats and stethoscopes.

what to do if your eye bleeds? - I would suggest getting yourself to the nearest whale healer as quickly as possible. They have big eyes, and would be sympathetic.

you know you’re old when - Sadly, I get a lot of these.

going on strike from your husband - I did that a long, long time ago. Although they call it divorce. It can be refreshingly freeing if you keep on walking sometimes.

rum for babies to go to sleep - This practice is frowned upon nowadays. I don’t know why, unless it’s the rampant use of Benedryl.

world of warcraft isnt a game - Yes, yes, it is. You, on the other hand, consider it a job because YOU HAVE NO LIFE.

Blogging mediocrity right here, folks! Get it while it’s hot.

Those of you who do have a life, may want to pop over to my amazing crystal shop and art gallery which is just full of my preciousssss.

Hot off the press! I found this morning, in my inbox, the following message:

Dear fellow Blogger

I have taken it upon myself to award those Bloggers/Blogs I have found to be mildly entertaining or somewhat likeable with The Knudsen Award. Do not feel obliged or obligated to display said award on yer Blog if you don’t want to.
You shall be featured on my award blog, yes another blog but more like a virtual china cabinet if you please.

Yer category is for the Best Psychic Blogger of 2008 for being open ,honest and helpful to those looking answers in their lives and the amusing stories you tell on yer Blog. I hope that 2008 is a great year for you and yers.

Yers Sincerely

Old Knudsen

I want to thank the thoughtful panel of hard-working adjudicants who made the decisions in this tough category. Me mum, rest her soul, is always jabbering away in my ear with psychic information, but mostly she is making fun of me. Mom, are you proud of me now? Or were you jabbering at the panel to award me with this? Next time, how about some lottery numbers, kay? Knudsey, I see through your curmudgeonly ways to the soft-hearted person you are!

And now, I must ask my gentle readers to contribute questions to Ask witchypoo, because it’s about that time.

On another note, I am considering setting up a shop witchypoo page to display and sell to my lucky duck readers some of my awesome crystals. The folk that help me with my next move will be ever so grateful if they don’t have to lug around a ton of rocks. And Ass Burger Boy will be happy because it may mean he can get the new router we suddenly need. He ain’t pretty without his internet, I can tell you.

Just because I have an award for 2008 in its own special category doesn’t mean I want you to slack off voting for me at the Blogger’s Choice Awards. I have thoughtfully prominently displayed the unsightly but convenient image link on my sidebar. No need to thank me. Really. Just be proactive and vote. Don’t make me put up that useless donate button again. Heh.

One of my pretty deep readers,Old Knudsen, has asked me some questions that require a post to answer. That, and a more lucid mind than I possess.

When you get a minute can you tell me more about the whole, ‘people know everything already’ theory either on yer blog or e-mail and if they do and you’ve been activated does that mean you’re always right?

I have made shamanistic journeys that would underline this theory. When you journey to the void, you experience everything, and know that everything is connected. All knowledge is available. Sometimes people can tap into it quite easily. The same people, when sick or not on their game, get a lesser connection. The information is valid, but sometimes the receiver is faulty. Kind of like computer problems that lie betwixt the chair and the keyboard.

The activation you speak of, is that the activation to the energy of the Archangel Michael? Because that’s a different thing. I activate or initiate people into the energies of Michael. It changes their vibrations in such a way that makes them a better vessel to channel those energies, be it through healing, or communication by channeling.

How does that go with humans forgetting information as a way of coping? I can’t see how we’d know everything unless there was a big spiritual connection with everyone/thing in the universe I don’t think our brains could take it as we can’t take the face of God.

I think I would go mad if I remembered everything. But then, I’m a gemini. I fear the sensory stimulation of New York City would overwhelm me. There is a spiritual connection with everyone/everything in the universe. We blink in and out of that reality several times a second. The face of God is love, pure and simple. And, yes, it is overwhelming to be in God’s face all the time. Not that she minds. We each of us, have the same access to God. Vibrating to the frequency of love is our ticket to ride.

Most confusing, I can see that not remembering our birth and deaths and various lives makes sense so maybe we aren’t meant to know. Using yer power do you ever feel like an intruder ?

There is a story from the Talmud about birth memory. In fact, this website was written by one of my first online friends, a very witty man, who wears many hats, including rabbi. (I typed rabbit at first, which rather amused me.) This website can explain this issue far better than I can.

I don’t like to use my talent in an intrusive way, because I wouldn’t want to be intruded on myself. Sometimes, it’s a judgment call, like when I am working with the police.

When I communicate with dead folks, they either choose to engage or not. Some of them are downright saucy. One even mocked my abilities and said “Tell her to go to somebody good!”

I find it frustrating to translate the experiential into words. Some of these experiences have no words. But hey, this isn’t a geek post, so go vote for me.

Or subscribe to my feed. My numbers are still too embarrassing to display.