Warning! Some very bad words are in this very old, recycled post. Is it okay that they are quotes? No? You can read this with your eyes closed then.

I have some issues on my system that I need to address, so don’t bother yourself looking for new stuff over the weekend.

Bluenose vernacular.

• Bluenose is slang for Nova Scotian.
• Vernacular is slang for slang.I made that up.
• God’s Country…a proprietary term to indicate a level of
  breathtaking beauty and real honest-to-gawd decent
  folk not to be had anywhere else. I use this one lots.
• Come from away…refers to anybody who was not born and raised
  ALL THEIR FREAKING LIFE in Nova Scotia.
• Fill yer boots…I interpret this to mean “help yourself, take as much as you like”.
  There may be more sinister, sheep-related implications to this however.
• Kiss my rosy red arse…I attribute this one to a love of alliteration.
• Petunia…when I was liddle, I called it my “bird” My fave uncle used to call me Petunia, and I HAD NO CLUE. I thought it was because he stuttered like Porky Pig.
• Oh, me nerves!…meant to indicate a stressful situation.
• Oh, me fuckin nerves!…this calls for more sympathy than Oh, me nerves!, like when it dawns on you that your favourite uncle was calling you “twat” (Disclaimer: My uncle did not know about this meaning. He was offended when I first posted it)
• Nobody likes a smartarse…what the Papa always said to me.
• Gimme a knife; I’ll cut me t’roat…usually said to indicate some unbearable pain for which death is the only solution.
• Spleeny…I am not making these up, I swear. Means unable to tolerate any pain or hardship. (see above)
• Twitchy…very irritable, or antsy
• Hotter than the hinges of hell…brings to mind an image of hell having doors.
  Temperatures over 80 F are hotter than the hinges of hell.
• Tits up…same as belly up, but more charmingly Nova Scotian.
  Sometimes indicates a person who is passed out from drinking Captain Morgan Rum or shine.
• And my personal favourite…Who pissed in your cornflakes?…are you having a bad day?
  And why must I be gifted with your lovely mood? (Another note: recently, Dr. Phil has been using a sanitized version of this saying. He totally stole it from me. I wrote this for another blog about seven years ago. Just so you know. And stop it Dr. Phil.)

Shameless self-promotion:If I’m the Freakiest Blogger you read, show me some freaking love. Go on, vote for me. You know you wanna.